Academic writing particular requirements:

The following 9 exercises including the key points of academic writting

Exercise 1. Wealthy parents shouldn't spoil their children. Otherwise, their children will become too dependent on them.

分析：文体错误，雅思写作中不可以用缩写， shouldn't ---> should not, 相应的I'm --->I am , can't--->cannot(注意中间没有空格）

Exercise 2. Today, newspapers report lots of crimes in horrible detail.

分析：用了非正式口语词汇lots of, 写作里面如果修饰C. noun可以改成用numerous, a host of or a vast number of ; 修饰UC, noun 可以用 a great deal of.

Exercise3. The impact of tourism on these traditional neighborhoods must be analysed.

分析：英美拼写混淆。Cambridge ESOL 明确规定：英式和美式拼写都可以接受，但是不接受把拼写在同一篇文章里面混淆。英式-se结尾时美式用-ze,英式用-our结尾美式用-or, tre -- ter

备注：小作文里头的数字后的单位也不可以照抄缩写 50km 应该为50kilometres.

Exercise4. Serious crimes harm people's lives.

分析：用词没有特色，每个词都是初中词汇，完全可以用下列方式替换》

serious--->severe(or grave)

crime--->offense(or criminal act)

harm--->damage(or destroy/ undermine/ jeopardise)

people--->individuals

Exercise5. The advantage of space research is more than its disadvantage.

分析：be more than 没有特色，雅思作文里可以用outweigh这个vt表示大于或者超过的意思。

Exercise6. Today, our world is becoming more and more reliant on modern technology.

分析：more and more 松散， 可以用increasingly这个副词表示“越来越...",后面再加adj.

Exercise7. Advertisements are everywhere. There are many ways to do advertisements.

分析：句式过于短促，有rap效果，可以在两句话中间把句号去掉加上and,形成一个并列句。

Exercise8. The environment is becoming worse. We must work together to cope with this situation.

分析：句式过于简单，可以在两句话中间把句号去掉加上therefore,形成一个因果关系的复杂句。

Exercise9. So, we should make sure that globalisation does not endanger our own traditional culture!

分析：感情色彩过分强烈，像love letter的效果，“！”--->. , so --->therefore

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